it’s not spite hold your tongue let the moment pass let the opportunity die a million times he’s not had to think while you accommodated but that’s not true a million times you haven’t had to think he would allow you to go. A million times you’ve saved yourself from being left. It’s not spite the way you think of spite it’s not spite it’s not self-spite to do what he would do see you directly, squarely in the face and slowly, deliberately turn either by force or apathy away in spite