My coworker said, “Hey, you’ve got that Don Corleon look going on.” I would frown if my face was capable of contorting. Instead, I wonder if I’m drooling on myself.

 

Once swelling begins to recede, that’s when you start feeling the effects of constriction. My jaw feels like a giant bruise.

 

I had a pain medication-induced epiphany. I don’t remember it all exactly. Something like, the hole in my head hurts. But then so does the hole in my heart. It seemed profound at the time.

 

My dad came and went and came and went and brought my mother once who made me tomato soup. They bought me chocolate pudding from Wal-greens, not the fat-free kind.

 

Get rid of it, I said or would have said if I had been coherent. And then had another epiphany. This must have been what it was like for Aron Ralston to disown his hand. I’m better off without it now.

 

They told me not to worry if the wound continued to bleed and infection continued to ooze. I realize now that tact isn’t the most pressing thing when the patient is drugged up and looking about wildly.

 

But the tomato soup was good.