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Category: About him

  • Unfinished: The Haikus

    Haiku Poems: On What I Won’t Experience with the New Him   fingers through your hair the feel of just-mown lawn grass sparks fly with my touch   so you want to go back Japan is lovely I hear no more me to see

  • Burned Nothings

      burned cookies     are nothing to burned fingers are nothing to burned egos are nothing to burned feelings are nothing to burned beings are nothing to you  

  • Self-injurious Behavior

    I knew there would be nothing between us, when you said I was easy to talk to, that you were comfortable telling things to me. Too close to the words he said, and I knew you were a different face, a different name, even a different man, but also, the same. He would tell me things…

  • Untitled

    Would I go back? Of course, I would to a time of physical discovery and comfort. I want that again and wanting is a sweet ache. I want to do what he won’t, a separate pain that prevents me from moving through viscous dreams to reality.   And anyway. If it were true, if it…

  • Doors: Not a Poetic Post

    This is not an ending. It’s both a door to friendship and a promise that some other door will open with someone else. My latest boyfriend wants to be friends. Well. Okay, he’s not my boyfriend. I’d like a boyfriend. I’d like one too much. But I suppose the best reframe is that the pressure…

  • Happy Holidays (What the fuck kind of thing is that to say?)

    You dropped me with two little words. Happy Holidays. What the fuck kind of thing is that to say? I love my men instantaneously. And am always surprised when the two of us, “us,” combust spontaneously internally how could this happen to me how could he/you not love me why am I powerless to stop…

  • Pastries: let’s not get ahead of ourselves

    Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.   Feeling momentarily hopeful is a far cry from being hopeful. My mood has lifted, but there’s a shadow in the back of my mind, always brooding, peripherally threatening me at all times.   Meeting someone new is not just scary, it’s terrifying. There’s the whole meeting for the…

  • Welcome

    If I wished at all I’d be content from here on From now until then   It was cold out, and he came to cook for me. The warmth of the oven did not compare to the warmth in my feet and gut. We pretended to work together as an excuse to get closer, him…

  • A Little Ditty of Rumination

    I feel goo and the thought of you in the back of my throat I try to shallow and choke it down   to no avail   My stomach is sick and your bullshit was thick as honey or tar and it sticks to me   still   **Note to reader: boredom is fodder for…

  • Progress

    Progress has been made when the color he loved doesn’t automatically  remind me of him Progress when pea green can just be a pretty color         again Progress when lime doesn’t force the echoes of         I have no affection to give you to ring in my         ears Progress when I lay me down…